Why We Chose a Micro Wedding as a Lesbian CoupleFirst off, I am now adding wedding planner to my resume. I have a newfound respect for that profession after FOUR months of rapid planning. It's no secret that I have been married and divorced. The shame surrounding that poor first trial has finally subsided in my body. Funny thing is that my current partner, like me, never wanted to be married. It wasn't legal l at the time she was in a long-term situation and she's grateful. For me, well... long story. The short version is that it happened, and it was quickly processed at the courthouse.
When we sat down and made the decision to do this because we could not fathom being unmarried (only to one another), she straight up said to me we were at some point going to have a ceremony. She wanted my mom and sister included as they were excluded the first time. She wanted what we shared to be treated differently. When my partner and I first started planning our wedding, we quickly realized that the traditional big wedding wasn't quite our style. We wanted something intimate, meaningful, and reflective of our unique journey as a queer couple. I did a bit of research, and the term 'micro wedding' flooded my screen. This was the opportunity to create an intimate atmosphere. With fewer guests, we were able to focus on the people who mean the most to us—our closest family and friends. This allowed us to share our day with those who have been part of our journey, supporting and loving us unconditionally. The smaller guest list meant that we could spend quality time with each guest. At larger weddings, it’s easy for the couple to get swept up in the whirlwind of events and barely have a moment to breathe, let alone connect with everyone. We wanted to be fully present with each person there, sharing laughs, memories, and heartfelt conversations. For us, a micro wedding also meant staying true to ourselves. Traditional weddings often come with expectations and norms that might not align with every couple’s vision. As a lesbian couple, we wanted to break away from any conventions that didn’t resonate with us. A smaller wedding gave us the freedom to create a ceremony and celebration that truly reflected our personalities and relationship. We personalized every aspect of our wedding, from writing our own vows to choosing a non-traditional venue that held special meaning for us. The focus was on our love and commitment, rather than on grand displays or formalities. This authenticity was incredibly important to us. Weddings can also be expensive, and we wanted to ensure that we were spending our money on things that truly mattered to us. A micro wedding allowed us to prioritize our budget. We could invest in quality over quantity. We splurged on a beautiful location, food, and a fantastic photographer who captured every precious moment. This approach meant we didn't have to stress over a massive budget or feel pressured to invite distant relatives and acquaintances just to fill a large venue. Every penny spent was for something that added genuine value to our day. Wedding planning can be notoriously stressful, but opting for a micro wedding significantly reduced our stress levels. Coordinating a smaller event meant fewer logistics, less pressure, and more room for creativity. We had the time and energy to focus on the details that mattered to us, making the planning process enjoyable rather than overwhelming. By keeping things simple, we also minimized the chances of things going wrong. There were fewer moving parts, which meant we could relax and enjoy our wedding day without constantly worrying about what might go awry. As a lesbian couple, creating a comfortable and inclusive environment for our wedding was crucial. We wanted our guests to feel at ease and for the celebration to reflect our values. A micro wedding allowed us to carefully curate the guest list, ensuring that everyone in attendance was supportive and accepting of our relationship. This smaller, more intimate setting made it easier for us to foster an atmosphere of love and acceptance. We felt free to express ourselves fully, knowing we were surrounded by people who genuinely cared for us and celebrated our union. Ultimately, our decision to have a micro wedding was about creating lasting memories. We wanted our wedding day to be a reflection of our love story, filled with personal touches and meaningful moments. The intimacy of a micro wedding allowed us to savor each moment, from the ceremony to the reception, and to look back on our special day with nothing but fondness and joy. Choosing a micro wedding was one of the best decisions we made as a couple. It allowed us to celebrate our love in a way that felt authentic, intimate, and stress-free (sort-of). For any couple, especially those in the LGBTQ+ community, considering a micro wedding can be a beautiful way to honor your relationship and create a day that truly reflects who you are. I'm happy to share my detailed budget sheet with anyone! Our micro wedding was everything we dreamed of and more, and we wouldn’t have had it any other way. Introducing Mrs. and Mrs. Thomas!
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For as long as I can remember, writing has been my refuge. Words poured out of me effortlessly, weaving stories and expressing emotions I often struggled to articulate aloud. It was more than a hobby; it was my identity. But a few years ago, I found myself staring at a blank screen, my fingers hovering above the keyboard, unable to summon the words that once flowed so freely. My passion for writing had evaporated, leaving me adrift and questioning my very essence.
It began subtly, a gradual decline in my enthusiasm. Deadlines felt like chains rather than motivators, and the joy of crafting sentences turned into a chore. I told myself it was a phase, something all writers go through. Yet, as weeks turned into months, I realized this was more than just a creative slump. The spark that once ignited my imagination was gone, replaced by a dull, oppressive void. I tried everything to rekindle the flame. I read books by my favorite authors, hoping their magic would inspire me. I read reviews from people who adore me. I sought guidance and camaraderie from fellow writers. I even experimented with different genres and styles, but nothing worked. The more I forced myself to write, the more it felt like an insurmountable burden. My passion, the one thing that had always defined me, seemed lost forever. Desperate and disheartened, I decided to take a break. I put away my notebooks, closed my laptop, and stopped pressuring myself to produce. It felt like giving up, but in retrospect, it was the best decision I could have made. Without the constant stress of unmet expectations, I began to explore other interests. I traveled, met new people, and experienced life in ways I hadn’t allowed myself to before. I started journaling, not with the intention of creating something profound, but simply to record my thoughts and feelings. I have sooooo many blogs! It was during one of these journaling sessions that I had a revelation. Writing didn’t have to be perfect or for an audience. It didn’t have to be anything but an honest expression of myself. The pressure to produce had stifled my creativity, and by letting go of that pressure, I slowly began to rediscover my love for writing. Since, I've been starting small. I write about my travels, capturing the essence of new places and the people I meet. I pen down random musings, snippets of dialogue I overhear, and descriptions of moments that move me. Without realizing it, I am writing again—not for publication, not for validation, but for the sheer joy of it. The words flow naturally, unburdened by expectation. The other day, I stumbled upon an old draft of a story I had abandoned during my creative drought. I read it with fresh eyes, and to my surprise, I felt a familiar twinge of excitement. Ideas started bubbling up, and I found myself itching to rewrite and expand it. That story, once a symbol of my failure, has become the bridge to my renewed passion. I have been ENGROSSED in it. Looking back, losing my passion for writing was a painful, yet necessary part of my journey. It taught me to let go of perfectionism and external validation, to find joy in the process rather than the product. Today, I write with a newfound appreciation for the craft, savoring each word and the freedom it brings. Writing, like any passion, ebbs and flows. It’s not a constant, unchanging force but a dynamic, evolving part of who we are. Sometimes, it requires stepping away to gain perspective, to grow in other areas of life, and to return with a deeper understanding of ourselves. Losing my passion for writing was one of the hardest experiences I’ve faced but finding it again has been infinitely rewarding. It’s a testament to the resilience of creativity and the enduring power of words. I’ve always been a thinker. My mind constantly buzzes with ideas, plans, and dreams, yet for years, I found myself stuck in a cycle of endless contemplation and minimal action. It wasn't until recently that I realized the true cost of this inertia: time wasted, opportunities missed, and a life half-lived. Bridging the gap between thinking and doing has become my mission, and it’s transformed my life in profound ways.
Relationships: Leaving a relationship is one of the hardest decisions we face. For years, I stayed in a relationship that wasn’t right for me, paralyzed by fear and indecision. I kept thinking, “What if it gets better?” These thoughts held me captive. Eventually, I realized that every moment spent in that state of limbo was a moment I could never get back. I could have been with my wife in 2019. We talk often about how far we'd be together had we just chose each other. The day I finally decided to leave was terrifying yet liberating. I stopped overthinking and just did it. Yes, it was painful, but it was also empowering. By taking immediate action, I reclaimed my time and energy. I learned that sometimes, the only way to find the right person is to leave the wrong one. Friendships Friendships, too, can become stagnant. I used to maintain relationships out of a sense of obligation, even when they no longer served me. I’d think, “We’ve been friends for so long,” or “What if they need me?” These thoughts anchored me in friendships that drained rather than nourished me. One day, I decided to prioritize my well-being. I began to distance myself from toxic friendships and focused on nurturing connections that brought joy and support. It wasn’t easy, but the immediate action made a huge difference. I found myself surrounded by people who genuinely cared for me and shared my values. Life is too short to spend it with people who don’t uplift you. Jobs Leaving a job is a monumental decision. For years, I stayed in positions that stifled my creativity and passion. I’d think, “What if I don’t find another job?” or “I need the stability.” These fears kept me in a perpetual state of dissatisfaction. One day, I made the leap. I quit my job without a backup plan, driven by a desire to pursue my passions. The immediate action was scary, but it opened doors I never imagined. I found work that excited me and aligned with my values. I realized that the time spent in unfulfilling jobs was time stolen from my true potential. I'm about to do it again real soon as I switch careers in the next few months. Procrastination is often rooted in fear—fear of failure, fear of change, fear of the unknown. But what I’ve learned is that procrastination is just another way of wasting time. The more we delay action, the more we squander the precious moments we have. Taking immediate action has taught me that mistakes are part of the journey. It’s better to try and fail than to never try at all. Each action, no matter how small, propels us forward. It’s a step toward living a life true to ourselves. Shortening the time between thinking and taking action requires courage, but it’s a practice that pays off. It’s about trusting yourself and believing that you are capable of handling whatever comes your way. Life is fleeting, and every second counts. Now, when I find myself overthinking, I remind myself of the power of immediate action. Whether it’s leaving a relationship, ending a friendship, quitting a job, or starting a new venture, I choose to act. I choose to live fully, embracing the uncertainty and the thrill of the unknown. In the end, it’s about creating a life that feels true to who you are. Don’t let procrastination steal your time. Act now, and watch your world transform. As June 19th approaches, communities across the United States prepare to celebrate Juneteenth, a holiday that marks the end of one of the darkest chapters in American history: slavery. Known also as Emancipation Day, Freedom Day, or Jubilee Day, Juneteenth is a time for reflection, celebration, and education about the long journey towards freedom and equality for African Americans.
The Historical Significance of Juneteenth The roots of Juneteenth trace back to June 19, 1865. On that day, Union General Gordon Granger arrived in Galveston, Texas, and announced General Order No. 3, which proclaimed freedom for the last remaining enslaved people in Texas. This momentous event came more than two years after President Abraham Lincoln's Emancipation Proclamation, which had officially abolished slavery in the Confederate States as of January 1, 1863. The delay in the enforcement of this proclamation was due to the minimal presence of Union troops in Texas to enforce the order until General Granger's arrival. A Day of Celebration and Reflection Juneteenth has evolved into a day of joyous celebration and profound reflection. Across the country, people observe the holiday with parades, cultural festivals, family gatherings, barbecues, and educational events. These activities highlight African American culture and heritage, emphasizing the importance of community, history, and shared experiences. The Path to Federal Recognition For many years, Juneteenth was celebrated primarily within African American communities, with limited recognition at the state and national levels. However, the tireless efforts of activists and advocates helped bring greater awareness to the significance of this day. On June 17, 2021, a historic milestone was achieved when President Joe Biden signed the Juneteenth National Independence Day Act into law, making Juneteenth a federal holiday. Understanding Juneteenth's Cultural Impact Juneteenth is more than just a celebration; it is a reminder of the resilience, strength, and enduring spirit of the African American community. It serves as a moment to honor the sacrifices and struggles of those who fought for freedom and to recognize the ongoing fight for equality and justice. Educational events and discussions during Juneteenth provide an opportunity to delve deeper into the history of slavery, the Civil Rights Movement, and contemporary issues of systemic racism. By engaging in these conversations, individuals and communities can foster greater understanding and solidarity in the ongoing quest for social justice. Moving Forward: The Legacy of Juneteenth As we celebrate Juneteenth, it is essential to remember that the journey towards true equality is ongoing. This day not only commemorates the end of slavery but also calls us to action in addressing the remnants of racial injustice that persist in our society. By acknowledging our shared history and working together, we can continue to build a future that upholds the values of freedom, justice, and equality for all. Juneteenth is a powerful testament to the enduring fight for freedom and the triumph of the human spirit. It is a day to celebrate, educate, and reflect on the progress we have made and the work that still lies ahead. As we honor this significant day, let us commit to fostering a more inclusive and equitable society for generations to come. |